Globetrotters

Franklin details cars here in the parking lot at Playa Blanca. One day we drove in & saw him working on a car so I ran over to ask him to do our Fortuner. He opened the car door & removed the glove compartment! Next he reached in & yanked out a filter totally black & nasty-YUCK! If this weren’t disgusting enough he proceeds to sniff it, then crunch up his face, hold it away from him & state the obvious “stinky” (malodor) in Spanish!

Duly impressed by his ability to ferret out the nasties in our car we asked him when he could work on it.

“Manana” he told us.

At 10am he arrived. I watched him ‘work’ from our window….hose in hand he’d scrub some, and then chat on his cell phone for awhile. He removed the floor mats, and then a buddy came by for a ‘visit’-more chatting! This was my kinda guy! No sense killing yourself working in this hot tropical sun!

By 1:00 I thought we ought to go down & give a gentle prod so he’d finish by nightfall. Franklin looked happy to see us & proudly gave us a tour of what he’d cleaned so far-gleaming in the sun, the car looked wonderful. I asked if he was finished & he looked shocked. Pointing to the engine & various other cubby holes he indicated he was far from done.

Then he pointed to himself, looked me straight in the eye & announced “I am a man.” I resorted to my usual tactic when confused by the ‘lingo thingo” & made a friendly face, smiled encouragingly at him, nodded my head & said “Si, si.” Hans asked what Franklin had said & I told him “He said he’s a man.” Hans looked confused & said “Was there some doubt?” I jabbed him in the gut-“DO NOT make me laugh!”

Franklin carefully watched this exchange, hoping for some response. Not getting any he decided to approach us with a different strategy. Using the old standby when in a communication glitch, he shouted out the same words, only this time LOUD & CLEAR! Pointing vigorously at himself he shouted “I AM A MAN.”

I stepped back, not sure where he was headed with this. I decided it was best to placate him so I shouted back at him enthusiastically in Spanish “SI MUY HOMBRE, MUCHO HOMBRE!” Giving him a vigorous thumbs up sign, I felt I had done my best to assure him of his virility.

Now it was Franklin’s turn to look confused & a tad terrified. He stepped back & stared at me. Then he opened his mouth WIDE! He pointed into that toothless cavern & yelled at me “TENGO HAMBRE.”

Suddenly the confusion cleared & it dawned on my menopausal mind what this poor guy was saying….”I am hungry.” In Spanish hombre (man) sounds a lot like hambre (hungry), especially if you have geezer ears & menopausal mind fog-LOL! I burst out laughing, to the consternation of both Hans & Franklin. I explained to Hans the confusion & he asked “Is lunch included in his job?” Guess so!

Off we went to scrounge up a bite to eat for Franklin…now if you’ve known me long at all you know I’m a food freak & follow Rose’s Rule of Food: You must be able to feed at least 10 people at a moment’s notice. This comes from living in a LARGE overextended Italian family where hordes of cousins might descend upon you at any time, demanding to be fed. If you failed in this family duty, the aunties talked bad about you. Heaven forbid!

It took us 3-4 months to ‘eat down’ all the food I had stored in our pantry, freezer & frig before we left Florida. BUT those days are gone forever! Our condo is too small to indulge in stockpiling for the Apocalypse. Plus the months of purging 30 years of accumulated STUFF transformed us into minimalists. Thus we found ourselves scrounging around the kitchen for food for Franklin!

I held up a jar of peanut butter & yelled out “How about a PBJ sandwich?” Hans held aloft his prize “With a banana?” Together we shouted “The Elvis special!” & cracked up. I wasn’t sure how this foreign treat would go over with a Panamanian but Hans had faith that Franklin would share his love for the Elvis special.

I decided to let Hans handle the lunch offering to practice his Spanish. I watched from the 9^th floor window as Hans approached Franklin & held out his treat. Even from my eyrie I could clearly see Franklin recoil with a look of horror on his face! Hans smiled, rubbed his stomach & proffered the plate again. This time Franklin held up his hand & shook his head! I imagined Hans encouragingly saying “MMMM-bueno!” Finally hunger overcame distaste & Franklin took a tiny nibble…his face lit up! A new convert to the Elvis special-too funny!